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Thread: Are marriages made in heaven ?

  1. #1

    Question Are marriages made in heaven ?

    This is the story of a real life couple separated forever by ???

    Ilavarasan and Divya were two youngsters in love with each other in Dharmapuri in Tamilnadu. The girl belonged to an upper caste (OBC) while the boy was a Dalit, shunned by the so called upper castes. Knowing that their union will be opposed by their parents and relatives, the couple got married in November 2012. The boy's parents accepted the girl and all was well with them. But the girl's father allegedly pressurized by political party of their caste, pleaded with girl to return home. But as the girl was unwilling to desert her love, the father took the extreme step of committing suicide. He was ashamed to face the world and his relatives and society. His death created great violence in the town. Many of the homes of the dalits in the town were destroyed and burnt and many buses were also destroyed. Total communal riots and violence shattered the peace of many.

    The girl who was leading a happy married life in her in-law's place, was threatened by her mother and brother and was accused of being the cause of her father's death. The mother seemed to have made emotional blackmail saying that she too would end her life if the girl did not desert her husband. Despite her love for her husband, Divya was forced to leave him and she declared in Court that to compensate the loss of her father's life and to console her mother and brother, she would leave her husband forever and live with her mother.

    This upset Ilavarasan and his family and they wanted to challenge the court order. The very next day, the boy's body was found near the railway track. While it is reported that he committed suicide unable to bear Divya's decision, the boy's family suspects a foul play in his death and refuses to take back the body unless an autopsy was done to their satisfaction. Meanwhile a suicide note allegedly written by Ilavarasan has been found.

    Tamilnadu is a state proud of its Tamil culture and heritage and of great Tamil poets like Bharathiar. Bharathiar was a poet who not only stood for the freedom of our Nation, but also voiced loudly for the emancipation of women who were dominated by the male population. He also wanted equality among fellow beings without any caste or creed dividing them. His famous lines in the poem Odi vilayadu paappa say "Jathigal Illai adi paappaa" ie "there are no castes, dear children". Though we praise the great Tamil poet and his songs, we do not follow what he taught us.

    It is a pity that hearts which become fond of each other are forcefully separated in the name of caste and religion. Here I would like to ask these people who politicize such incidents and who question the caste of innocent youngsters who are separated by untimely death or divorce : If someone in the families of the so called upper caste is on his death bed or is in need of blood, do they ever question the donor to which caste he belongs to before accepting his blood or organ? Then why do they not change their attitude when it comes to inter caste marriages?

  2. #2
    New Member Priyamvada's Avatar
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    I can see that everyone is creating his/her own hell. I am appalled at their collective stupidity. To think all these things still happen. Once women are taught that they do not need marriage or family to find meaning in life, everything will be fine.

  3. #3
    Evangelist funlover's Avatar


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    Once women are taught that they do not need marriage or family to find meaning in life, everything will be fine.
    it's a interesting thought. however, in this case there was real love. girl didnt love the guy just for security or for marriage or for society. there was a connection until tree-cutting politicians cut that as well for a change.
    Be Happy. Just Enjoy Your Life!


  4. #4

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    Priam and Funlover, thanks for your inputs. Yes as Funlover says, the girl and the boy were really in love with each other and the boy's parents at least were not opposed to the marriage. If only the politicians seeking votes for caste hadn't interfered in these personal decisions, the couple would have been living happily together today. Though the girl might have lost the contact with her family, who knows, they might have even accepted them in due course of time...

  5. #5
    New Member Priyamvada's Avatar
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    If it were real love, why would she leave him after being married to him? I find the parents weird too. Threatening to commit suicide after she got married? How does suicide help? Certainly, it didn't here. And these caste wars will continue. The girl definitely was put in a very difficult position, and made a scapegoat for all the ills of society. That is why I said, speaking generally, women should never put themselves in such a vulnerable position. They are always held responsible for caste purity, caste duty and are made to feel guilty for so-called deviant behavior. It is only when they are empowered and educated that they will be liberated from such gender socialization.

  6. #6
    New Member rameshpatil's Avatar
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    Really sad story, there are many good and bad stories.

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